________
Private tutoring sessions
for George Alexander Bush

Washington, Sept 14, 2035
(AP – Atheist Press)

In a move to provide his son with educational experiences not available to our nation's ordinary people, our Supreme Commander appointed Edward Smith to preside over a team of six of our nations top educators for his son, George Alexander Bush
     The team, drawn from our nations top university talents will spend next four years at Camp David. They will attempt to overcome genetic mental deficiencies recently discovered on his father's side of the family.
    Between them, members of this team have earned international fame through their Four Nobel Prizes, Two Pulitzer Prizes plus numerous scientific, biochemistry and medical awards.
    Cost for this venture has not been disclosed but the senior Bush, third Bush to lead our country, confirmed that his team and their families, would be housed at the taxpayers expense. “Really, it is a small price to pay in order to ensure that the successor to my throne will continue to maintain our nation’s position as Number One.”
    “Four years may not be enough time. We will do our best,” said Smith. He appeared somewhat apprehensive about his appointment, but extreme pressure was brought on Harvard University to release him for this assignment. The University reminded Smith that a Bush decree could cancel his tenure and make it impossible for any other University to employ Smith.
    Observers believe four years could be enough time if Bush senior continues to employ his team of media specialists, and control some of the efforts by rogue reporters to uncover details of how severe these genetic maladies may be. His specialists appeared successful in covering up George Alexander's sexual preferences but were thwarted by photos published by the Washington Post until a forensic retouch specialist, hired by the Bush family, proved that the photo was a hoax.
    “We believe the best chance for George Alexander being accepted as a great leader lies in a field of combat. With seasoned professionals there won’t be too many opportunities for him to fail. Besides, our nation has a record of overlooking its moral boundaries when winning and profits are at stake.”
    “I think our biggest task will be improving his public speaking.” His predecessors had a terrible habit of attempting to speak intelligently when their feet were in their mouths, which was often,” added Smith.
    George Alexander Bush was not available for comment. He and his cousin are guests at a private hunting camp where rumour has it that they are taking target lessons.
                     _______________________
                                Six Years Later

NY Gyros still undefeated!
US America dominates world
with football supremacy
Bangalore, India – August 17, 2041
(AP – Atheist Press)
The NFL’s New York Gyros continued to frustrate India's High School football efforts with a 217-0 victory in the most one-sided contest of their tour.
     In their 10 th consecutive victory, the Gyros never allowed the opposition to advance beyond their own 23-yard line – a kick off return that only lost six yards.
     The game was called at the 10-minute mark of the second quarter. India was out of players.
    Gyro’s owner, George Alexander Bush, the 18-year-old who was given the team by his father, was exhilarated with the win. “Isn’t this great! We have six more games on this exhibition tour and I guarantee you, we will show no mercy,” he said.
    “Our objective is to dispel any thoughts India may have of competing with us as for dominance in the football world. We plan to go to China next.”
    The Minister of Sports for India reported that they never had plans to dominate the football world when they accepted Bush’s goodwill offer for his team to introduce India’s youth to North American sports. They thought the tour would comprise teaching sessions, workshops and skill development sessions. They did not believe that their high school teams would be called upon to play the NFL Gyros.
   India’s Minister of Education also expressed his displeasure over Bush's demand that their opponents had to provide at least 24 cheerleaders for each contest. There were reports that, so far, 15 girls had committed suicide rather than be sacrificed as prizes for the winners.
    There are also reports that several Gyros players gave up a chance to enjoy their choice of a cheerleader, opting instead for their young football opponents.
    There are unsubstantiated reports that “Buster” Jones, Gyros 420-pound middle line backer had attacked the Education Minister after the press conference. Thje minister is in serious but stable condition at Bangalor's Hospital.
    When asked about this incident, Alexander said it was just a little misunderstanding and that he couldn’t blame Jones for letting his passion get out of control. “Maybe the Minister shouldn’t have spoken up as he did,” said Bush.
    Coach “Crusher” Walters reported that his charges only problems resulted from the heat and humidity. “Our heavy football uniforms were definitely a handicap. Perhaps for our next game we can get rid of the helmets.”